First off let me say, holy shit. I Feel fucking old. Wearing BMo made me realize I maybe the oldest Adventure Time fan out there (26), because everyone under 18 FLIPPED shit when they saw me. Especially little kids. I Was WOEFULLY under prepared for that predicament. Specifically there was this group of girls under 10 dressed as Disney Princess' and they flipped fucking shit everytime they saw me. Like their heads were exploding and they were freaked out and in turn I was freaked out. Like freaked the fuck out. So that was kinda awesome in a corny way that I made abunch of little girls' day. Hell, boys too and abunch of other people.

On the bad side, the costume. Specifically my BMo cosplay. This was first and foremost a test run since my first serious costume and there were problems. ALOT of problems that I'm glad I discovered. Also on the bad side, one of those problems? BMo apparently is a goddamn pervert. The string snapped off the right arm so I had no control so I tucked it inside, which is about waist level. Well it wasn't good enough because somehow BMo copped a feel on alot of people. Male and female and I couldn't really do much about it. So for that I say to all those people I am goddamn sorry. Also to the Catwoman cosplayer who got super pissed about it, I am super sorry. I Didn't mean to and I'm not some crazed pervert. For Gods sake I accidentally groped a Mark Twain cosplayer. MARK TWAIN COSPLAYER. I GROPED HIM! Now I know there's tons of sexual fetishes out there, but I don't think one exist where you accidentally cop a feel on a Mark Twain cosplayer and get off on that. So with that I am still sorry and next time my wavy blue arms will not be awkwardly groping people.

Other then that it wasn't bad. My friends were super disappointed I didn't enter the cosplay contest since when people found out the buttons were spring loaded, more shit was freaked the hell out of people. Man, people be freaked at this con with how I'm typing. Anyways, there was many problems that by then if I had waited still for a competition with all the mistakes it had instead of putting it away a few hours earlier before it drove me insane, then I'd probably would go ballistic.  Anyways, more work I got to do on it before Denver Comic Con. I'm just glad it somehow made alot of people's day or was "The best thing they've seen this whole weekend" So I'll keep at it.  Eventhough it makes me feel super old. People in their 20's who watch cartoons, where you at?!

Also my legs in tights? BMo comes off as having waaaaay too muscular looking legs according to my friends when they looked on in shock when I stood up in tights. I'm shocked too that my legs actually look good.

Well, it's 4-20 here in the states. A time where sales of Doritos and Funnyuns hit an all time high as people smoke as much marijuana as possible. No where is this more true then in my home state of Colorado, where we're one of first states to legalize it. Though I'm not spending my time indoors watching a marathon of Cartoon Network and getting baked, nope! I'm going out to cosplay!

Though there also within that lies my problem, which is I've never seriously cosplayed and now I'm about to take that giant nerdy step forward of putting on an outfit I put time on and show it to a large crowd of people. Yes, I've done random costumes before like Senor Iron or half assed robots, but this time I didn't half ass and actually put *gasps* EFFORT into something! So I've spent days, even months working on this and it almost feels like I'm introducing a child to the world. A child who's skin I wear and pose in pictures, so exactly what the purpose of a child is (I have no children of my own).  So now because of this, I'm just nervous. Nervous and/or excited. I Haven't even decided or know what the difference is still.

For the most part I'm proud of my work. For a first time effort, I think it looks fantastic, but the fact I've spent so many waking hours with it means I know all it's weakness and blunders of where it can go wrong. Oh this part could've been caulked better. Oh there's a scratch here. Oh I hope the suspenders hold. ALL THIS DUMB SHIT that I want to forget and know it'll be okay, but now I'm obsessed with. So now I'm just obsessed and don't know how the next few hours will go. Well, besides me eventually sleeping and not typing this and obsessing. I Feel I got to air this out because I'm proud of this child of styrofoam I made. I'm also proud that this creation stemmed partially from anger with my friend saying the only reason me and some of my other friends cosplay is out of anger in thinking "GODDAMMIT! WE CAN FUCKING MAKE SOMETHING!" And it's true, which leads to me saying anger can take you to many places, kids! Though in my case it'll still leave you nervous and excited in what you can or cannot do. So we'll see how this costume goes in a few hours. I Just had to air all out so I can get it off my chest, but goddammit I'm still eager to do it and show people the hideous blue foamy child I've made.

Bitch took my hair style from 2 years ago! Mostly it was me too lazy to put up a mohawk so I called it a downhawk! I Rocked that hairstyle BEFORE bass got obnoxious. Also I still don't know of any song he's ever done. Also on the odd part, apparently my friend saw him before he was Skrillex live and stared at serenaded him. My friend is a guy. Good times and I needed a break from cleaning and organizing. This has been useless thoughts with Bill Pardy.

Dear asshole who can't put his phone down at the Ministry show last Sunday after Denver Comic Con,

Kill yourself. Seriously, please kill yourself. There should be law against assholes who literally must put up their phone all through out a damn show to constantly take pictures, videos or pictures and videos of themselves at a show. It is discouraging for the whole entire human race you think people give two shits about you or your sad social life, better yet, you and your grainy, badly lit and terrible sounding videos (same with pictures except take away the sound portion of my comments). Also why is it I was NOT surprised you had no girlfriend with you or when you were holding up your phone to show everyone behind you the grainy ass photos you just took I saw not one picture of a lady? Just at best one man, aiming a camera at himself trying to look cool with a concert or building behind him. Sadly there were several as if the world must know of your existence next to these places like you argue with yourself if you exist or not. Unless...wait, there is no excuse for this douche baggery. Just literally thrust your hips into a meat slicer and if large mounds of flesh are being ripped from your hips then you're doing it right. Once you see your lower body has been separated from your upper body, use the last of your strength to cram the rest of your head into said meat slicer...jaw first. Social networking is a privilege, not a goddamn lifestyle necessity. Especially one for a life as sheltered as yours that makes concerts more annoying then they should be.

Otherwise it was a fantastic show with a great opener (The Overcasters) and one that lasted a bit too long with an awkwardly (I believe) unintentionally racist name "Blackburner."

Oh and Denver Comic Con was more fun then it should be despite being whipped and stabbed in the eye. Mexican families loved my slightly racist ironic Mexican Iron Man costume (Goddamn, you Mexicans are such hipsters) and I got to meet my favoritest writer, artist, inker and colorist team in all of comics. I Can go on, but is it ever fun to read about people's con thoughts? The only other things that happened was me tossing 3D Avengers glasses at random people while screaming obscenities at them. Note: people don't mind getting criticized or pelted long as free stuff is involved oh and Asian people suck at catching, but black people are amazing at it (who knew, right?). There's more, but delightful con especially for a first time is where it'll end up.

Dear 7Up,

I Have been a long time drinker of your carbonated beverage since I was nothing, but a wee lad remembering the times when us as a society accepted a red spot with sunglasses as a "cool guy." These days though I have become a man. I Have made love to a woman and built a tree out of a house all at once and must complain to you good sir. I Must ask do you have a recipe or ingredients you follow for your main drink 7Up? I Ask because sometimes it tastes delightful and full of a more heavy lemon themed taste. Though others I occasionally grab a case and it tastes like someone spilt the ashes of a deceased relative into the vat.

Like I literally imagine someone walking into your factory and during lunch they had to pick up a jar of ashes of a loved one (a grandparent, dog, an old left shoe) and literally that person just trips on a random pebble and spills that whole damn jar of ashes into the vat. Though the problem is this on and off again problem has been going on for over a year. So I literally imagine weekly someone's dead cat is spilt into a vat of 7Up and I'm drinking a different dead ashed something with each can.

Really, WHAT THE FUCK? Who wants to taste goddamn ashes in each can that is advertised as lemon-lime carbonated drink? Does no one not notice this taste of old man made in goddamn 1000 plus degree heat? Please tell your goddamn employees to quit goddamn bringing their ashes to the work place and spilling it in the 7Up mixing plant. I Want a consistent flavor of lemon-lime not debating if I open a can and wonder if I'm gaining the soul and essence of something that died.

Dear Diary,

As we grow older we start to notice different things in the world. For one thing we start to become overall more and more cynical assholes. I Am no exception to this "growth" as I haven't listened to a public radio station on my own free will in years. That or I start to see many movies and shows as just getting stale and is no different from a pimp willing to let someone do whatever they want to their ho for the right price. The things we use to love no longer interests us as much. Sure, cars are still awesome, but goddammit I care about shit like fuel efficiency more then anything else now. Then things slowly start to spiral, spiral in ways we never thought possible, the time when we question at our own age, are we turning into goddamn hipsters?

Now I think this is bound to happen to everyone since as we grow cynical and old, the one thing we start to hate is young people. For me predominantly it's people who shop at Hot Topic. Now my beef here is I grew up in the 90's which gave us such jewel treasures as Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Power Rangers and whatever else we can get for cheap from Asian studios. So it always just drives me insane when people under 18 go into the stores and buy merchandise from cartoons that they weren't even around for when it aired. Then those words are uttered, those words that you can rephrase all you want, but you know it so. "I Like Ninja Turtles/Power Rangers BEFORE it was cool."

Hipster.

I Have turned into a goddamn hipster or so I think. The immediate next reaction is after you said it you begin to realize it and you don't know whether to deny or accept that is this the age where you look at the world as literally you vs. the mainstream. Now you can deny all you goddamn want, but it's true because it feels like being a cynical prick is the way to go and you can't change it. Suddenly you realize everything you hate that everyone else loves. You fucking hate shows with laugh tracks. Shows like Big Bang Theory and How I Met Your Mother become the enemy of lesser rated shows like Community or Parks and Rec. That and you slowly begin to hate the people who defend and love those shows.

BUT IT DOESN'T END THERE! Suddenly you begin to realize as you're growing up you need clothes that say or define who you are. Black shirts are so passe and you realize it doesn't hurt to add color to the wardrobe. Suddenly you go for ironic shirts that give some stupid meaningless statement on who you are. "This shirt has humorous text and a picture because I want people to know I am witty." Majority of the shirts I buy are really now just that. The others are hoodies and hoodies and shirts of bands I've seen live simply so I can say I was there as if I look for the underground that too questions if anyone is against the conformity of buying shirts from Hot Topic or Target for a clearance price and pretending like they've been a nerd all their life.

I Feel I have become all these things and then some. No wait, I am these things. Though I don't know. Have I become full hipster? The weird straw suddenly become the crushing blow to my metaphorical camel when I realized scarves are fantastic accessories along with wristbands. WHAT HAS GODDAMN HAPPENED?! WHAT WAS IT THAT MADE ME LOOK BACK AT MY YOUTH AND SAY TO MYSELF "Goddamn, who needs this many black shirts?!" Is this a sign I am turning hipster? Craving attention?! Possible 20's life crisis? I DON'T KNOW! OR MAYBE I'M TRYING TO MAKE A DRINKING GAME FOR EVERYTIME I'VE SAID HIPSTER YOU'RE TAKING A SHOT *spoiler alert: you're dead or passed out or soon will be*

Though there is hope or I think there is. As much as I love bands like Metric and slowly growing into other bands that aren't Metal or Aggrotech, I realize I can admit I like different bands and not do it ironically. Maybe I have become some kinda nerd-hipster hybrid (a nipster perhaps) that sees the growing age of information and technology as a means to find new ways to entertain myself. That I can have a middle ground and the fact I don't drink, therefore cutting out the possibility of Pabst Blue Ribbon ever going down my lungs means I have not become like them. Nor do I suck the dick of Apple, though they do make good products and I do have a few iPods an-NO! NO GODDAMMIT! I AM BETTER THEN THIS!

To summarize this never ending escalating entry of pointless mind numbing madness, I will finish with this. I Was nerd for far too long and I'll be damned if I can't be a cynical assholes over pretending they are now because of what a store or movies tell them. Go me and people who think this way though in a slightly more well constructed paragraphs or whatever.

-I'm Bill Pardy

First off, I JUST SPENT GODDAMN $86 ON CONCERT TICKETS! PLUS THE SHOW ISN'T EVEN UNTIL JUNE NEXT YEAR! Goddamn, I feel confused. Like I was beaten with doorknobs for 15 minutes and immediately got laid afterwards by a gang of bikini models. Mostly because the tickets are for Ministry and they're coming to the states for only 5 days in 4 locations and my state was one of them. SO EAT IT ALASKA! YOU MAY HAVE PENGUINS AND THE RIGHT TO HUNT FURRIES THAT ARE ACTUALLY ANIMALS, BUT I GET TO GO DEAF BY THE LOUDEST BAND WITH A LEAD SINGER WHO'S BEEN VOMITING BLOOD FOR 6 YEARS!

Second, HOLY SHIT! Then I spent about $35 or so to see Testament & Anthrax featuring Death Angel later in October. Then the week after Unearth is doing Halloween themed shows here. Then two weeks after Unearth I got Mastodon featuring Dillinger Escape Plan and Red Fang. So literally it's nonstop baptism's of sweat coming here. I Look forward to being crushed under the mass of people as I run in a circle. Good times.

Third, go see Drive. Man, did I enjoy Drive. It felt like a 60's movie with 70's level violence and a soundtrack similar to the 80's (first half at least). Also just the cast and characters were great. The movie isn't one for giving many of it's characters dialogue, but instead let their faces and the music help tell the story more then them just going on long monologues.  So yes, I enjoyed it alot. It was subtle, but added up to be a great experience.

But Blood on the Dance Floor maybe one of the worst fucking things I've heard and possibly seen in awhile. As in on par with Brokencyde and Breathe Carolina bad. Normally I can let such stupid trivial things fly, but when one of my favorite bands (Angelspit) has to open for such a shitty band then I almost feel tempted to punch an oil tanker until it burst into flames. Plus because of such a horrible band now I have lost interest in seeing Angelspit. Goddamn I need to find me an oil tanker...

And I didn't go to the anime con this year and right when I didn't the voice actor for Dean Venture is there. Fan-fucking-tastic. I Curse the heavens and my friends for having no money so I have no one to go with anyways. Motherfuckers. Man, this is the most normal blog I've done.

Oh and I like tiny girls wearing giant shirts. Is there something wrong with me? There now it's gone back to creepy and awkward.

I Feel better now.

[link]

CD's:
Unearth: Darkness In The Light - $9

Games:
Bulletstorm - $16
XBox 360 250GB HDD - free

2 KMFDM tickets - $61

Comics - $41

Total: $127

Goddamn, KMFDM tickets KILLED me, but I haven't been to a show in months now and that KILLS ME slightly more. What slightly kills me more is I keep buying goddamn games. For every game I beat, 2 take it's place. So welcome Bulletstorm! You're literally game number 777 in my collection. Sweet llamas in the Bahamas there better not be anymore goddamn game deals next week. This is starting to murder my wallet and I got to temporary save it by saving up...for sweet, sweet merch money at KMFDM.

XBox 360:
-Final Fantasy XIII - $8
-Toy Story 3 - $8
-Medal of Honor - $8

Nintendo DS:
Mario Hoops 3-on-3 - $8

Nintendo Wii:
Ghost Recon - $5
Rayman Raving Rabbids 2 - $5

CD's:
Nick13: Nick13 - $8
Demon Hunter: The World is a Thorn - $8
In Flames: Sounds of a Playground Fading (DLX edition with shirt) - $13

Total: $71

Goddamn Blockbuster 4th of July sale. Not spending it on things to try and blow my face and hands off so instead bought more games...As if I needed them. Well, stupid cheap and stupid awesome buy 1 get 1 free sale. Plus goddamn GoHastings sale for giving me the CD's I want on sale. All beginning of the week stuff, before the week kinda took a turn for the weird with a fender bender car accident and the cops not showing up and recommending to my friend he should stab me a bit just to see if they'll show up quicker. For better or worse it didn't come to that and the cops didn't show up eitherway. So we'll never know if the plan to twist the knife in would've worked or not.

Though I must admit, I got to thank Gohastings for holding me back from going to Hot Topic for the time being to buy the new Unearth CD. Though I want it so bad. SOOOO BAD. Like how a stabber wants to stabby stab stab something so good and hard.

-New 360 Controller - $16
-3D IMax ticket for Transformers: Dark of the Moon - $17
-Join the Awesome Threadless hoodie [link] - $24.50
-My Other Ride Is a Lightcycle hoodie [link] - $24.50
-Comic books - $32
-XBox Live Arcade Unplugged - $5

Total: About $119

Man, I HATE Shia LeBeouf. I Realize now any "attractive" female's self worth is lowered when they're his girlfriend in a movie. That and GOD HELP US if any flying squirrels watch Dark of the Moon for they will go and destroy man with the tactics learned from the film. Otherwise, it was a fine movie, minus the fact you have to accept that Autobots are TOTAL assholes compared to Decepticons and the 150 minute long run time. Otherwise...alot of spending, but got ALOT of cheap 360 controllers for friend's so could be worse.

Them Crooked Vultures - $10
Metric: Live It Out - $7
Nekromantix: Brought Back To Life...AGAIN - $6
Curve: Come Clean - $2
Eagles of Death Metal: Peace Love Death Metal - $4
Sonic & Sega All Stars Racing - $12
Rock Band 2 polo - $5

Total: $46

Damn GoHastings sale. Damn need for a kart racing game. Damn need for more shirts, but...MORE JOSH HOMME! This is also the first time I haven't ordered a batch of CD's and not get something metal. Which is kinda odd and awkward.

Dance Central - $12
DJ Hero Renegade Turntable stand - $5
Dinner with friends - $30
Summon Night: Twin Age - $7
Total: $54

I Now have 4 DJ Hero Renegade Turntable stands so suffice to say...I DON'T KNOW WHY I BOUGHT ANOTHER! I Kinda feel like I want to make some kinda sweet ass fort out of them or just stuff them full of guns like that documentary of Mexico, Desperado. Otherwise not too horribad on spending though considering first concert of the Summer (Nick13) and trying to calm down the excessive. Also I'm curious if I can spend one month without getting anything video game related, which sounds like a horrible losing battle for some reason (if it isn't one already).

Though onward to getting KMFDM tickets next week or so though!

Week of June 5

Excitebots: Trick Racing (with steering wheel) - $12
Kinect w/ Kinect Adventures - $79
Guys night out - $17
4000 MS Points - $35
2 Super 8 tickets - $21

Total: $164

Yup, kinda went overboard this week. I'm hyped on Dance Central 2 so I finally bought a Kinect after tired of borrowing my friend's and I know now how well to jerk it. Er, the dance, not the...you get it. Guys night out was out to eat and going to a bar, which is deeeeelightful because I don't drink, but I did beat the shit out of a guy at Street Fighter Alpha 3 with my Sakura. I Kinda feel I should take it easy for my sake for next few weeks.

I Kinda like to keep tabs on stuff whether it be how many games or Blu Ray's/DVD's I own or just knowing which counties I have to stay out of due to restraining orders (one day Hailey Williams, you'll understand my love and won't scream when I have to drive through a gate and break a window in order to do so). So kinda for my own stupid indulgence I'm going to attempt at the each of week to keep tabs on my spending that isn't bills or gas or whatever. Why am I doing this? I Have  no fucking idea. I Think I have OCD, that or it's the frugal Asian side of me that demands I keep tabs on my spending. Eitherway...

Week of May/22/2010:

Nintendo Wii Games:
Animal Crossing: City Folk - $8
Wario Land: Shake It! - $5
Fling Smash (w/ Wii Motion Plus Remote) - $21
Batman: Brave and the Bold - $6
The House of the Dead 2 & 3:  The Return - $5

XBox 360:
Tomb Raider: Anniversary - $4
Scene It! Box Office Smash - $4
Star Wars: The Force Unleashed II - $5
Dead to Rights: Retribution - $6
Guitar Hero: Smash Hits - $5

Misc:
8 pack of Sharpies - $6

Total spent: $76

First off both a blessing and a horrible curse. A CURSE I say on Blockbuster having that damn Buy 1 get 1 Free sale on games $15 and under. My damn game collection is at 759 total right now. So more for the backlog. Super duper. Also I didn't originally want Animal Crossing and Guitar Hero, but the games I got prior were scratched to shit so no choice, but to return and settle for that. Though I started Dead to Rights and there is a weird joy of playing as a dog and biting people in the groin and then dragging their carcass away into the shadows and repeat until you have a pile of corpses all caused by groin bites. EVEN BETTER is that some of them count as stealth kills despite their friends with guns literally being 5 feet away they don't hear their screams as you go for the jugular and blood spraying in the air. I Wish real dogs could do that...Wait, it'd probably happen to me. So scratch that.

Otherwise besides comic books today that is about it for spending this week (yes, I'm a nerd, big honkin surprise I know). I Think or goddamn well hope.

I Don't know why, but I decided to reopen my dA account. It's either I'm bored or...

You know I have no damn idea. It's kinda like when you keep driving and driving and then you black out and when you wake up you're driving through a cornfield with no windshield and a trail of blood on the tires. So it's like a casual Sunday I guess.

Hey kids!  Want to wonder how I lost about 5 or so pounds in about three days?!  I'll tell you!  FOOD POISONING!  That's right!  When you eat the wrong thing at an Asian buffet that your friend drags you along to you can lose weight in no time!  Take it from me, I've been shitting and vomiting out my guts for the past few days and I feel fantastic*!  Sometimes it gets so terrible I vomit out my friggin nose!  Oh boy!  It's like the scene in The Exorcist made awesomery!  So if you want to be like me, go to an Asian buffet and prepare to lost that weight!

*By fantastic I mean I've been popping awhole lot of pills to try and calm it down and it does shit.  To make matters worse the writing on the pill bottle is in Chinese so if I end up dead or making a journal about a testicle growing on my ears, you know what happened.

For those who don't know, the cast of Robot Chicken has been going on a roller tour across the US with Gym Class Heroes (AKA 8 or so cities total in the US) and one of those stops was my stomping grounds in Colorado.  Before going on I got to talk about Gym Class Heroes.  Now for the most part, I don't give a rats ass about that and I always get them confused with the Flobots.  Well since they were playing yesterday and for free...

Well...

It was by far one of the worst concerts I've seen.  Mostly because the lead singer did like a 15 minute or so intro of him just talking to the goddamn audience and it was stupid as shit.  Next when the music started my stomach started feeling ill.  This is the first time any concert or any music in general made me want to vomit.  Second, I saw girls wearing Tool and Slayer shirts and guys wearing Killswitch Engage shirts all rushing to the front to see them...

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!  Though to be fair this concert did give me some hope for the World as this was a widely publicized free event, but it still didn't have anywhere as much people as when I went to go see In Flames, which was mostly word of mouth.  Other then that, Gym Class Heroes, you are by far one of the worse bands and I hope you all die in a flaming airplane wreck.

As for the festivities themselves not involving Gym Class Heroes...

Man, I saw alot of moose knuckles on girls.  It was really disturbing.  Though my friend got to check Seth Green into the glass and we took a picture, but the picture itself looks like he was brutally raping Seth Green against the glass which makes it all the more better.  Besides that, Seth Green is tiny as hell.  Almost like a Hobbit, if not tinier.  Though he signed three of my things and commented my Dewey Cox shirt, which oddly enough got alot of comments.  Besides that it was sweaty as friggin hell in there, but goddamn they had a WORKING Marvel Super Heroes arcade cabinet there.  So I can't complain, it was all free.  Though I did steal a Robot Chicken road sign when I was leaving.

October 10th is Dethklok tour here though...

At first I felt like making a joke.  Something along the lines of "13 year old girls gathered in a single convention, what can go wrong?"  Then I started thinking and realizing girls pass the age of 13 enjoy this shit and well...

It's this  [link]

A Twilight convention?  Are you fucking kidding me?  First I thought this was a joke when I saw it in one of my magazines, then I did a Google search and now...

Now I'm just disappointed in humanity all the more.  Seriously, what the fuck can you do for full three days of this?  I'm gonna dress up like a cocaine fiend with a heart of gold (and a costume contest for BEST looking Coke addict!)!  Um, yeah you do that (spoiler, that guy losing his hair and rapidly shaking and scratching his neck outside on the street corner is going to win the cosplay contest).  A Two hour discussion on who's the dreamiest guy?  Sure, whatever.  And...

REALLY?!  WHAT THE FUCK ELSE CAN YOU DO?  I Guess they can watch the first movie for 24 FUCKING HOURS AND THE POOR FUCK OF A BOYFRIEND WHO GETS DRAGGED TO THIS SHIT BETTER BE GETTING THE BEST GODDAMN FUCK FOR ATTENDING THIS...OH FUCK, WHO AM I KIDDING HE'S PROBABLY GAY TOO.  

So what the fuck society?  Since when do we envy the guy who looks like the coke head and sparkles like glitter in the sun?  Now I see why terrorists hate us.